2022 was a somewhat rocky year for me. I gained some and lost some but overall, it was a good year.
I learnt ALOT and as somehow that is just entering her twenties, I feel like I still have a TON to learn…hopefully not in a hard way.
These are the lessons I learnt this year
• It doesn’t matter what others think
I think most times we’re always bothered about what that person would think of me or what this person will say about me, I’ve realized it really doesn’t matter. Half the time, it’s all in our head. We think/feel people will think this or say that about us when meanwhile everyone’s just trying to get their own shit together too. I’m living happier not caring about what people will think about me or my style or my taste.
• Pick yourself, do not wait for people to pick you
This year, there was a moment where in my head I thought “oh this guy definitely likes me” and I liked him too but something happened when it dawned on me that I might be deluding myself or interpreting the signals wrongly and the way I straight up started hating on me. I kept telling myself “there’s no way he likes you” “it’s all in your head” “he knows way prettier girls” “of all people you think he’d choose you?”. It got so bad that I was almost depressed.
But I gave myself a good “snap out of it” slap. Why do you care about what this guy thinks about you so much? Who cares if he doesn’t like you? There are also way handsome guys! Why are you beating yourself up based on assumptions that you made up in your head?
It was bad but I got out of it.
Then I realized that I might be farther away from fully loving myself than I thought cause I should not treat me that way, you know?
It’s a work in progress everyone!
• Don’t force things/people to stay
Damn, the number of friends I lost this year😂. People that I made goals for the year with, people I was so sure would still be friends with me right now. That’s how unpredictable life can be.
I had an argument with a friend, we were both in the wrong cause she did something or kept doing things that really hurt me and I may have handled it too harshly which led to us not talking for months. I’m usually not the kind of person that holds grudges so I had forgotten about it but she didn’t. Till now, she still blatantly ignores me in our group chat which is very awkward so last month I thought “oh she must’ve been really hurt by the things I said” (p.s: she hurt me for months with words and actions) and somehow my devotion for that day was a message of forgiveness and letting go.
I texted her to apologize for the things I said and said I would appreciate if we could move on from everything that happened and this girl ignored me😂 still hasn’t responded till now. So I’m like okay time to let go.
Do I regret calling her out? No, you should always speak up when you don’t like how you’re being treated especially by people you call your friends. But I do think I should’ve handled it better and I plan to be better at that moving forward.
• There are lot of things we have no control over
This was a hard pill for me to swallow this year. I’ve realized there are a lot of things that are out of my control and no matter how frustrating it can be, that is just the way life is.
• Quality is better than quantity
I learnt this in terms of friendships and relationships. I mentioned that I lost some friends, I do not completely feel bad because the friends that are with me right now are worth it. So you might have many friends you hangout with all the time but the friends that really matter are the ones that will be there, the ones that understand or at least try to understand you, the ones that will choose you too, those are the friends that matter. They could be 2 or 3. Numbers don’t matter.
I’ll post the rest of my lessons tomorrow.
What lessons can you relate to? What lesson did you personally learn this year?
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