THE REASON WHY GUYS….(I)

Heyyyy guysss!!! Happy Monday!

Hold up, when is Monday ever happy? Monday is my WORST day of the week. Literally, the reason I survive through Monday is because I anticipate Friday. Catch me on a Monday morning, I look like the guys in Zombie Apocalypse left one zombie on the loose and that’s me!

I literally have a test tomorrow, another reason I don’t like Mondays. It’s the day that begins all the tests and exams. It’s just a very nerve wracking day but thankfully, I’m about to make your day much better because we are finally doing….

THE ONLY GUYS POST!!!! 🍾

I know y’all have been anticipating it! Especially the girls… How do I know?! Well the anonymous questions I got, looked like they had been prepped. Like someone sat and thought through them😂. The guys were abit cool with their questions but you girls decided to go ALL IN and excuse me, I’m not complaining 😏.

Before I introduce the guests, I wanted to address some of the anonymous messages I got cause it’s like some people didn’t get that the point was to get questions for the blog post but I didn’t want it to go to waste so let’s just use it in the post as well 😃.

Well those are my thoughts on that and finally to the part we’ve been waiting for….

INTRODUCING THE BLOG GUESTS!

Ayyy ayyy ayyy let’s get into it!

Q/A

1. Why is it rare to see a guy express his feelings for his partner in front of his friends?

Laju: The first reason could either be because the guy is ashamed of the girl, or he’s probably cheating on her.

Trey: I don’t think it’s rare, but truth is, I can only speak for myself because I can feel however with my friends because they’ll understand anytime.

Dara: My niggas can’t catch me simping. Nahhh cause I’m supposedly meant to be the alpha😂🤧.

Dapo: It’s not just about expressing feeling in front of the friends. Most girls have this attitude of forming ,thy find joy in making guys look like a fools in front of their friends . For instance, I’m expressing my feelings to you and you are saying “I DONT KNOW IF ITS MUTUAL”, that’s a big disgrace.

David: We don’t want to look soft and vulnerable. If/When we do, we always end up like softies when we’re with our friends so nahh, act tough and cold.

Ibrahim: Most of us young adults, don’t want to be labelled ‘soft bellies’ or ‘yemi my lover’ by our friends cause of the hard guy and patriarchy charades that are in trend amongst us.

2. What is a huge turnoff for guys?

Laju: Gold diggers.

Trey: It depends actually because you know there’s a saying that first impression matters alot so for me it’s the impression you give me.

Dara: Being too loud and talking too much.

Dapo: When the attitude isn’t the same ,when the vibes isn’t equal .

David: Personally, its not being straight forward, and trying to be “AMONG”. Not being straight forward in the sense that, tell me what you want, talk to me clearly, how do you expect me to understand what you want when you don’t tell me😂, and being “AMONG” like trying so hard to be a “COOL KID”, nahh, its just ughh.

Ibrahim: Different strokes for different folks. For me, people who are generally insensitive and folks who always feel the need to impress, pretentiousness, ostentatious display of material things, garrulity. Those aforementioned are huge turn offs for me.

3. Do you like girls better with or without makeup?

Laju: Without, I love to see that inner beauty.

Trey: I really don’t know but #teamNatural. You’re beautiful just the way you are ❤️

Dara: Makeup pleaseeee, I like them edges laid, eyebrows done and the lips glossy.

Dapo: Natural beauty please.

David: Without, definitely without.

Ibrahim: I always feel makeup is nice but should be done on only very special occasions. I’ve always fancied girls on light or no makeup. Never crushed on a lady wearing heavy makeup.

4. What do you notice first about a girl?

Laju: Her height

Trey: This question sha. But it’ll probably be her personality and her fashion. Then you know the rest na.

Dara: Her lips and hairstyle.

Dapo: Her attitude.

David: The way you act. Like lowkey, before I start looking at you very well or scanning you, something must have drawn my attention, whether you’re loud or you’re quiet or the way you talk to people, its just in the act.

Ibrahim: Her brains🤧…i was just kidding, her looks is the first thing I always notice and I like to peek the behind too. I’m a big fan of big behinds😁.

5. What would you do on your first date?

Laju: Ask all the important questions.

Trey: Hmm it depends on the kind of girl I’m with, but mostly I wouldn’t want something cliche. You know memories matter a lot.

Dara: Go kart racing😁.

Dapo: First date wow! SHYNESS EVERYWHERE 😂. I’ll be so speechless cause I’ll just be looking at her face and holding her

David: Probably go see a movie, or go to a park or a restaurant. #MISTER-ROMANTIC

Ibrahim: On my first date, i would like to know the other party well and try to make them have a good time cause they have to get the worth of their time spent.

6. Brains or beauty? Why?

Laju: Brains- I want a woman who can aid my decision making, not make me broke at the end of the day.

Trey:Both. And I don’t really feel anyone isn’t beautiful because beauty is in the eyes of the beholder so it depends but for me both lol.

Dara: Both (I can’t choose only one). I want a pretty girl who’s smart.

Dapo: I’ll go for the beauty cause it’s not too late to learn ,but it’s too late to be beautiful.

David: Brains. As a guy yeah, I can’t make decisions on my own. If I have a girl and I want to make a RASH decision, I need someone that’ll tell me, “Nah, why not do it this way, cause that way might not be the best..” you get? Not someone that’ll let me do anything as long as she benefits from it.

Ibrahim: Brains ohhhhh, beauty is important cause i don’t want ugly kids but Brains is importanter cause i don’t want a dumb wife and dumb kids. Imagine having a partner that you can’t rub minds with, they’re only at their best superficially. That to me is dreadful, you don’t have to be at Einstein level, common sense and basic emotional intelligence is enough.

7. I’m a guy and I just want to know if you workout and what’s your routine?

Laju: Yeah I workout every morning and night twice a week.

Trey: Yeah I eat , I sleep, I make music everyday.

Dara: Occasionally though, I do 15 push-ups and 15 sit-ups in the morning.

Dapo: I don’t work out cause I have so much school stuff.

David: I do a 3 days full body split, so I do resistance training and a little bit of cardio like 90/10.

Ibrahim: I do workout, infact I am every passionate about fitness. I workout 5 days in a week and I do more of calisthenics at the moment cause i can’t afford a standard gym membership.

8. What are your thoughts on paying for dates? Would you want to pay or split it?

Laju: I feel it should be shuffled. Sometimes the girl runs the bill while some other times it’s the guy, then some other times it’s split.

Trey: Not necessarily, sometimes she might say she wants to pay for the ride or she wants to buy me something so it’s not something I put to mind. We just go out, have fun and make memories.

Dara: Yes I’d love to pay, but it would be very sweet if she offers to pay once in a while.

Dapo: In my perspective, I pay cause that’s what a gentleman should do . If you can’t sacrifice some things for love, why did you enter in the first place? but some girls insist.

David: Honestly, paying is not an issue, I mean I wouldn’t ask you out on a date if I can’t pay you know, but I think there should be times that we both split the cost, cause that way it shows that she’s actually down for you guys.

Ibrahim: First dates are always on me. After the first, it solely depends on who wants to see who, some people might tag me frugal but i believe in equity.

9. Do you like when the lady makes the first move?

Laju: Yesss. I personally rate that alot cause for some reason, it’s becoming a norm for guys to always make the first move.

Trey: Yeah sometimes because I like boldness you know? But not too bold

Dara: Well yesss, my girl made the move for our first kiss and I thought it was very cute and candid, asper she knew what she wanted.

Dapo: Obviously.

David: Yeah, it’s pretty cool tbh, at least the roles are reversed and I’ll play hard to get😂😂.

Ibrahim: As a formerly very shy person ,now I’m just shy😅, I really love it when a lady makes the first move. She doesn’t need to do much, just a simple ‘Hello’ and I’ll pick it up from there.

10. Why do guys ghost?

Laju: Sometimes the most suitable option is to ghost cause; 1. His mrs might be pissing him off and he doesn’t want to escalate the matter, or 2. He’s tired of the girl but doesn’t know how to lay her off easy.

Trey: Hmm guys can ghost for a million reasons. Like maybe there was a disagreement or misunderstanding or you just want space.

Dara: My explanation may differ from others but, an average single guy has at least 2-3 girls he’s talking with yeah, if he’s feeling the vibe with one more than the others, he consciously or unconsciously ghosts them.

Dapo: Ghosting is a choice. Someone is also ghosting them.

David: If a guy has been hurt so much before and he’s talking to someone and starts catching feelings, the best way to let those feelings die is to ghost. Cause if he keeps talking, he’ll develope more feelings and risk another heart break.

Ibrahim: I can’t give an accurate answer to this cause it depends on the individual, some guys love it when they string a girl along and just go cold on her. In their head, it fuels their ‘hard guy’ ego but for me I’ll always ghost if I sense that my engagement isn’t needed or the convos are becoming perfunctory. Let me add this, some girls too are really boring, like they can’t hold interesting conversations.

11. Would you take a girl back if she cheated?

Laju: It depends on the amount of love I have for the girl.

Trey: I wouldn’t. Because that trust isn’t there anymore, and then I feel it’s disrespectful so we’d call it quits.. do you know how many women are in the world ?

Dara: Yes I would, only if she didn’t have sex with him.

Dapo: Depends on who she cheated with. I can’t accept her back if it’s someone that was close to me.

David: No. I believe cheating is a preconceived action, its not something that happens by “MISTAKE”. Nah, you have to actually want it before it happens, so once you cheat they’re telling you that “..you and the relationship are not worth it..”. So, bye bye.

Ibrahim: Nope, I can’t. There’s no explanation to this, I just can’t.

12. How do we tell when you guys are uninterested?

Laju: We either spill it or we stop doing things we used to do.

Trey: Attention. If I don’t give you my attention that’s it!

Dara: If I don’t text you in 24hrs just to say Hi or ask how ur day was…..I don’t want then (that’s for texts sha).
But in person, I’d avoid physical contact and I wouldn’t compliment you.

Dapo: Lack of communication, the way he used to reply and the way he replies now will change.

David: We don’t fw you like a priority, we don’t reply fast, we don’t really bother to know how you are. Basically, if we’re uninterested, you’ll have doubts whether we like you or not.

Ibrahim: Severed communications, inattentiveness, nonchalance and lack of respect.

13. How do we know you’re interested?

Laju: We always want to talk to you, always want to be where you are.

Trey: Attention😂. If I give you my attention

Dara: In Person: Shy guys would avoid eye contact but would always want to be around you, confident guys would not avoid the eye contact, they would also wanna be around you and ask when you’re available so they could see you.
Over texts: We reply you quick😂😩 we flirt, use flirty emojis sometimes and we always wanna know more about you. We let you know if we can’t text back right now.

Dapo: The way you communicate will speak already cause you don’t expect someone who isn’t interested in you to give you so much attention and is willing to listen to you when you sad.

David: If a guy is interested in every single detail about you, like he wants to know how your day was, is always looking for opportunities for you guys to see, then he is.

Ibrahim: For most of us ,we’ll strive to do the extras for that person we’re interested in; talk to them, share personal matters with them, try to make them laugh, pay more attention to them. For me personally, I’ll be interested in the person’s growth.

14. How hard is it to move on from your ex?

Laju: It depends on how deep in love I fell tbh. But I’d say approximately 3weeks and I’ll be good.

Trey: It’s really hard especially if she was very close to you and you guys were together for a really long while and you thought it was going to last forever so it can be heartbreaking but eventually you’d get better.

Dara: NGL it’s hard if you don’t have friends or things that would help get your mind off the pain.

Dapo: This is the hardest thing in life after loosing a loved one.

David: It’s honestly very hard, especially when you thought you two had something going on, then they up and leave like you never mattered, sigh. But regardless, we meuve!!!!!

Ibrahim: When I first started dating, I used to get too attached to my exes. I derived my happiness from being involved with them but now I’ve learnt that my happiness is from within ever since then detachment has been easy, if though I might feel hurt a bit, I know i won’t be in a bad shape.

15. What is with guys and saying “no homo” after complimenting a guy?

Laju: I am personally extremely homophobic so I’d say it’s a clear warning that says “yo guy I’m not gay” i just want to appreciate you. It’s just to clearly state out the difference.

Trey: 😂 Yeah, it has to be known. I mean no homo 😂 it’s just a compliment, he’s just putting that out there.

Dara: Some niggas are too scared to be labelled as “gay”😂😂 lmao. But I don’t care. If I like how you’re looking, I’ll tell you straight up, I never hide under the ‘NO HOMO’ umbrella.

Dapo: Cause in our country, homosexuality is not allowed and no one wants to be tagged as GAY or FAG . Just like how you girls tell each other “I love you” and touch each other, guys can’t do it , it’s more difficult for us thats why.

David: Lmao, females and males take intimacy very differently. A girl can sit on another girl’s lap, or call another girl “girlfriend” but to guys….naaaaa, that’s just wrong dude.

Ibrahim: Most guys cringe when you tell them you love them, so that’s why you have to add ‘no homo’ so as to let them know there’s no hidden agenda. I used to be like that before but now I can tell a guy i love them without adding ‘no homo’. I say it all the time to my cousins😁

16. What’s the best and worst thing about being a guy?

Laju: The best thing about being a guy is the fact that I can pee without sitting down😂. The worst part is there is no worst part. I love it🤩.

Trey: The best thing hmm is just being alive in good health thanks to God. The best thing is having to wake up every morning to chase my dreams and always try to improve on my craft as an artiste. Being able to be part of a hustle, being able to believe strongly in myself is the best thing and I don’t think there’s a worst thing, so I’m grateful to God

Dara: The best thing is that I don’t have to deal with a ‘time of the month’ or expensive hairdos. But the worst is that, the other gender can falsely accuse us of rape and jail us on their word for years and the fact that my masculinity is being considered ‘toxic’ until a heavy box needs to be lifted.

Dapo: The best thing is we don’t go through all the pains ladies go through and the worse thing is that everyone is counting on us; family, friends and we do most of the hard work.

David: Personally, the best thing is not having to suffer physical pain, like MP and all (Ope o), the worst is the responsibility honestly, when you get to the age of logical thinking, you start realising how hard being a guy is and will be.

Ibrahim: Best thing is standing up to pee and the worse is that people can easily know when I’m sexually aroused 😅…I was just kidding, the best thing for me at the moment is that I know that when I walk down the street at night or I’m in a party i know i can’t be sexually molested or being cat called by bunch of guys. As much as it is a blessing for me, it is disheartening to know that our females don’t feel comfortable in gathering without familiar faces or in an open place marketplaces because of the fear of being assaulted by insensitive men, we need to do better. The worse for me is effect of toxic masculinity; ‘men don’t cry’ ‘don’t show you’re weak ‘ ‘how can you say you were raped, men don’t get raped ‘.We are guys not robots and we have emotions too. Another one for me is our financial capacity, there’s so much pressure on us to acquire large wealth that the means most of it is being acquired doesn’t matter as long as the bag is being secured. Only the end justifies the means nowadays.

Well that’s it, that’s it…I think the final question is a good way to end this post, right?

I mean, I OBVIOUSLY have some opinions about some of the answers we got…a lot of opinions actually but we’re not going to be getting into that today.

But if you want to share your opinions or thoughts cause I’m sure you have some then comment down below, just right below the post and if you’d like to follow any of the guests then their social media handles are right below this;

Laju: Instagram: @__laju
Snapchat:@laju_aa

Trey: Instagram: @lendu_treyyyyy

Dara: IG/Twitter: @desofficial__ Snapchat: @des.perado11

Dapo:Sc: adefowoju_adeda
Twitter: @adedapoayo
Instagram :@adedapo

David: Instagram: @daeev.png
Snapchat: 🥶Papii-Chulo❤️
Tiktok: Wrld.of.daev

Ibrahim: Twitter: @OGMarshmallow1

Thank you so much and wishing you and I, a kinda not stressful week. Love you!🤍

• WordPress