REAL TALK: “AM” IS NOT FREAKING “I’M”!

Good morning, afternoon and evening to you, wherever you are in the world! I am happy to have you here. I hope you have a marvelous time on my blog! God bless you!

I didn’t practice that in my head and now reading it out, it sounds like the type of greetings we say in primary and secondary school when a new teacher or a supervisor comes to our class for the first time. I’m not going to change it cause I’m allowed!

So accept my terrible intro because….

I was going to say I’m human but the honest reason is because I’m too tired to think of another one plus I’m very sure, some of you will smile/laugh at that so I’m keeping it in.

Moving on, I’m sure some of you are wondering “Why is she posting on a Friday?”

Well, my fellow lads, after having a discussion with my board of consultees which by the way is me and two other imaginary people and I also asked one or two friends, it is decided that the REAL TALK WITH IB series should be published specially on Fridays to give room for other categories like the YOUR VIEW with the guests (by the way, Monday’s post is going to fireee) and other segments/series cause honestly, there are a whole lot of things to talk about on Real Talk, so many things!

Why do ostriches bury their heads in sand?

The fact that Nigeria is so lame and America is racist?

The list is endless!

And that is why now, I’m going to be publishing on Mondays and Fridays. I hope you’re ready for this! I hope I’m ready for this cause I’ve been so comfortable with just one day a week so this is probably the best way to push me out of my comfort zone but I like it because I like ranting about the things that annoy me!

Talking about being annoyed, like 3-4 people dmed me this week across my social media accounts and boy, like two of them annoyed me to my spinal cord.

REAL TALK WITH IB

Is it just me?

It can’t be just me who HATES when people dm me with “Heyyy” and I get high hopes that this could be a reasonable person and then I see, “Am Greg”. My heart sinks, like down into the bottomless pit cause whyyyyy?????

I’m about to offend some people but I couldn’t care less cause I’m sure more than half of the world agrees with me.

Why are you using “Am” for “I’m” bruv? The both of them are just two letters so what would it take you? Literally just remove the A and replace it with an I, complete with an apostrophe like bro, would it kill you?

Another person was texting me and I was like, “I can’t respond right now because I’m busy” and she goes, “Ok, anoda tym”. NO HUNNAYYYY, there is no another time with what you just wrote!

I can’t! I just can’t!

I’m super tolerative. Honestly, there are a lot of things I can bear but this? Nope, not even a strand of my hair can tolerate it. One time, I used to admire this guy (which doesn’t happen everyday) till we started texting. The bar went from like 70 to friend zone. He got better by the way.

Seriously, it’s a huge turn off!!! Ewww

And no one can tell me that I’m being dramatic because I’m sure everyone has that one thing that turns them off immediately and me, being someone that writes, it just doesn’t settle! I’m so detailed with my messages down to punctuations so pardon me, if these kind of things don’t sit well with me 🤲🏽.

Imagine, after a very long and stressful day and you’re texting this person for maybe humor or to make you feel better. The message pops in and you see “maybe u shud jst rest”, maybe I should just stop talking to you so I don’t get a migraine, you mean.

I’ve had to be in group chats where people typed like this and it almost made me want to cry. We’re killing the English language!😂

People might say what if the person went to a public school or didn’t go to school at all. If you didn’t go to school, then you’re pardoned but I don’t think (I might be wrong) that there’s any school whether public or private that will teach you to write “r” instead of “are” plus I know people who attended public schools and they don’t type like that. The only excuse is if you didn’t go to school so you weren’t taught. That’s cool, that’s fine, but not you, yes you, who attended the same secondary school as me and texting me a year later with “Long tym, how r u?”.

See, I’m not trying to say abbreviating is wrong. It’s obviously not, most organizations abbreviate their names, we also have words like Dms, cause rather than because, PC, even some real estate companies advertise in newspapers using words like bdroom for bedroom to save cost by using lesser space but not you taking an entire word and replacing it with one letter.

It’s a MASSIVE TURN OFF (not for only me, I’m sure) so if you’re wondering why you aren’t getting anywhere with that girl or that guy, it’s probably that. If you don’t do it and you’re still searching, 2030 is your year!

I could go on and on but I’m going to stop here cause I’m hungry and this topic is making me hungrier.

Please please please, if you’re one of the people that write like that, I’m begging you, help our already damaged world and do better. Thank you!

I feel like I saved someone’s future relationship or marriage today😂.

Anyways, we’ve come to the end of my rant. I’m sorry not sorry if you felt offended but I still love you and please come back cause it’s not everyday I bash people, I promise😂.

Thanks for reading guys and I hope you guys are excited for next week Monday’s post. It’s our regular YOUR VIEW with some first time guests on the blog and also our first guests for 2021. Also, the topic itself is one that needs to be discussed all around the world so hopefully we do justice to it.

I hope you had an amazing week and I wish you and I a blissful and stress free weekend. Love you all!🤍